Stop... | brokenalways's Blog

 
It's been raining, and raining... and raining.
Weather sucks in England!!!

Oh and if its early-ish or late-ish, the ice starts to come-- picking my brother up from work, like the amazing sister i am- at 10/12 PM. I have to go out like 10ish minutes before just to spray the de-icing stuff and get the scrapper out... OH and yesterday i was sat in the car waiting for it to warm up, (in my PJ's cause i wasnt changing just to get to the car & back) and waiting for the screan to become a bit mroe clearer and less icy, when i saw a person pass through my mirror. i locked the doors, turned my music on and started driving- even though it wasnt totally clear.
It was like- 12 at night though, so in my empty street to the main road, i drove a couple minutes really slowly hoping it would clear.
FUCK. it scared me though. im such a soft-ars.
I'd just prefer not to die like that. - I mean, sure, let me die, just not in THAT way.

SOooooo.
That guys been talking to me, asking bout me and my friend who has fallen out. Still completley no words to each other, give it a few weeks maybe.... Well, i dunno, he just annoyed me the other night when he wouldn't speek until there was nobody in the car but me and him. I mean- it just totally pissed me off so i've just been ignoring him.
When me and my friend fell out she did say- 'he's too good for you'' anyway, like meaning i am a complete bitch and slag while he is actually a nice guy.... I mean, im not that much of a bitch, and, im not a slag. Yes- i gave a guy a blowjob down an ally, yes, i kiss more than one guy on a night out.
BUT she can barely talk. She nearly had sex with someone in an ally once, she kissed tons of people on nights out- boys & girls.... She cannot talk at all. Kissing isn't like serious anyway in my opinion, and , im still a virgin! How can i be a slag!? She seriously doesn't let anything drop!!! ARG!

SO. Chilled out now. Computer time for a bit. Then out in the rain, run to the car, freeze while driving to my brothers work and singing full volume to christmas songs (which i have been doing all day and deafning my brother before when we went to the shops!) then back home, in my PJ's and tele and bed.


OH.
and i got my clothes- the ones i gave the wrong address too.... I bought some pretty black jeans- i barely ever wear jeans, so i thought i need new ones and i might wear jeans more.... AND like four knickers, two thongs, two bras and i think that was it.
The other stuffs i ordered from annsummers have been delievered today or sent out for delievery kinda thing, so hopefully ill get them in the next few days. I LOVE new clothes & stuffs.... AND haven't been online underwear shopping for ages, so i spent nearly 100quid on them. Ooopsy.

SO. I totally tinstel-fied the house today. Maybe a little over the top. Whatever. I woke feeling miserable so needed to cheer myself up, christmas songs on, decorations up, went to the shop to buy pretty christmas stuffs. Cheered me up a lttle.

The day before yesterday (and like 4 days before too!) i was in ultra depresive mode. Yesterday i woke up feeling good. Today felt shit but managed to turn it around a bit. I hate being miserable.
SOMETHING> let me be happy!!