pulling away... | brokenalways's Blog
i cant help being so unattached and not getting close to people.
Why do I always pull away?
I don't like being accidentally touched or knocked. Most irriatting thing.
I was meant to be going out with this guy I've seen a few times- I drove there- then texted him to say I couldn't come. I mean- I drove like half hour but then didn't want to anymore. I'm so werid like that.
he's a nice guy. I'm a bitch though.
Like my skank of an ex friend said to me - ' he's too good for you' - yeah. Probably right there.
went to the grave today- first Christmas without my lovey neighbour. Loveliest sweetest person you've ever met. Took way too soon. I was thinking about when we were leaving the after-funeral do. About 7 months ago. About how her daughters told my mum she cared for us so much. My mum was like a daughter to her etc...
I don't actually know how ill cope if any of my close family ever die. I nearly died when my doggy had to be put down more than a year ago. And at the neighbours funeral I was fighting back the tears.
I just don't cry in public.
I cant- like - let people see my weaknesses if i can hide them.
Come to think of it- i never cry anymore. At all.
from years ago,- crying every day. To never now. Still depressed. Just dealing in a different way. Well- never coping. Never really 'dealing' with it...
Why do the good die? ... Lets get your life right... Never knew I could hurt like this...
listening to 'byebye' by Mariah carey, akon & lil Wayne.
Love this song...
Lying in the dark. So so ill. Right near christmas- great.
Maybe ill get out of going church tomorow night. Every once a year- Christmas eve- parents force us to go. I am kinda... Religious. Just totally not the church going type. Actually hate church. I'm not even sure if I believe in god and stuffs there's so much shit that doesn't make sense....
There are no comments on this post yet, be the first to leave one!
Previous Postsjust happy..., posted April 23rd, 2014
hatred..., posted February 22nd, 2014
on with things..., posted February 15th, 2014
time..., posted February 5th, 2014
boredness blah..., posted January 30th, 2014
not right..., posted January 26th, 2014
always a good..., posted January 21st, 2014
waiting for the future..., posted January 13th, 2014
super horny..., posted January 5th, 2014
back to normal..., posted January 4th, 2014
home..., posted December 18th, 2013
worlds cruel..., posted November 26th, 2013
hope everythings fine..., posted November 13th, 2013
all done..., posted October 26th, 2013
moody thing..., posted October 23rd, 2013
new day..., posted October 12th, 2013
Its' confidence..., posted October 9th, 2013
better for tomorrow..., posted September 29th, 2013
saturday..., posted September 28th, 2013
kinda lucky..., posted September 27th, 2013
something wrong..., posted September 22nd, 2013
starting..., posted September 22nd, 2013
too quick, too nervous..., posted September 16th, 2013, 1 comment
desperation led to goodness..., posted September 15th, 2013
second week..., posted September 11th, 2013
not much..., posted September 7th, 2013
better..., posted August 6th, 2013
it hurts..., posted August 4th, 2013
home..., posted July 29th, 2013
Lovely day..., posted July 9th, 2013
says it by the name..., posted July 7th, 2013
Not sure..., posted July 2nd, 2013
living for the weekends..., posted June 25th, 2013
What's happened..., posted June 12th, 2013
long..., posted May 19th, 2013
too good..., posted May 8th, 2013
dog..., posted May 6th, 2013
touchy..., posted May 5th, 2013
mood..., posted May 4th, 2013
happy..., posted May 2nd, 2013
away..., posted April 28th, 2013
bound to happen..., posted April 27th, 2013
story..., posted April 21st, 2013
lazy sunday..., posted April 21st, 2013
time again..., posted April 20th, 2013
think..., posted April 17th, 2013
money..., posted April 17th, 2013
sun brings smiles..., posted April 15th, 2013
on my way..., posted April 13th, 2013
good..., posted April 12th, 2013
BlogrollHere are some friends' blogs...
HelpEmbed Photos Embed Videos